book recs

hey all. i'm interested in doing some reading on masculinity and am looking for some recommendations. what are things that you've read that you've enjoyed or found helpful? anything would be great. thanks so much.

Issues of masculinity and unresolved issues of status

[This was originally a response to a post, but I thought it brought up good points, so I want to get others' feedback. The original post is several posts down.]

Masculinity is, of course, very important to men. But I think there's an online trend of "promoting" or at least "studying" masculinity and I think the trend, its practitioners and many things associated with it are pathetic and effeminate.

I won't say anything new about masculinity - a desire for dominance; persistence; pride; maybe wisdom. But I try to imagine great men from history and I cannot, AT ALL, imagine them worrying about masculinity as such. I'm reading a book about Hassan ibn-Sabbah right now (master of fortress Alamut and founder of the Ismaili Assassin sect) and I cannot picture him thinking about masculinity.

Nor can I picture even his novices, who are described as just young men undergoing military and diplomatic training, as worrying about this. They act (and I believe, think) like normal men act (and think) around one another.

I was, however, thinking about STATUS - now, status is probably more important. I had this discussion yesterday: what if you have healthy self-esteem and you are in order but your social and sex lives are not in order. You seem normal, decently risky, etc, but -- people aren't thrilled about you. Now, sure, you can treat it with indifference (which I guess would be masculine) but then at the end of the day you'd still be by yourself as opposed to partying with fun, sexy people. I haven't thought of an answer to this yet.

box of rocks

(no subject)

I posted these questions in my own journal, and I thought I'd post them here, too.

How do you define masculinity? Like, not a dictionary definition, but your own personal definition? If you are male, how does this apply to your own life? Is it something you actively think about, or is it something that just "is" and you only think about it when prompted? Do you believe in the whole "alpha male" thing as applied to humans, or is that just a label people apply in certain situations?
Missed Connection- Adrian Tomine

(no subject)

I am writing a Research Paper for my Sociology class and I need to find more males (only males-- it's about how men react to female emotions/crying) to take my survey. So if you'd like to help me out, I would be eternally grateful.

Survey!Collapse )

(no subject)

My name is Johnny. I am a student working to transfer to a UNI to major in psychology and human sexuality. I am currently conducting a research study on the paraphilias/atypical sexual variations that involve urophilia (arousal from urine/urination), coprophilia (arousal from feces/defecation), and emetophilia (arousal from vomit/vomiting). I am running a very basic survey as part of my project. I am looking for participants that would be willing to take 20 seconds or less to anonymously fill out my survey. The survey is rather flimsy as I am not basing my survey on a specific population. My intention is to get a generalized idea of how many people (at random) fantasize or engage in urophilia, coprophilia, and/or emetophilia, as well as which ones favor one another. This will add some jazz to my project. To avoid bias answers, I am posting my survey in communities that I feel will be open minded and mature and not only just fetish based communites. I would like to get about 500 participants total. I really appreciate your help. Thank you.
The Difference Blog

The study of gender differences

differenceblog: I'm about two weeks into a semi-scholarly new blog about the study of gender differences (both intentional and incidental). There's a new post every weekday discussing some aspect of gender differences, and then a commentary post on the same theme, giving a perspective on it from my life in two genders. If that's something you'd be interested in, please stop by and let me know what you think. I'm also looking for suggestions on where else to mention the blog to find interested readers.


(no subject)

This anti-evolution "backlash" is doing GREAT THINGS for sociobiology.


Until recently, social scientsists have been terrified of applying ideas of evolution to society. Theories like memetics and sociology of science (how ideas come to gain strength) and other things within social psychology have been killed for fear of being too conservative. After all, the Nazis and robber barons used social darwinism to justify exploitation and even murder. Sociologists hate exploitation and shy away from conservativism.

But guess what? Evolution has become branded liberal again! Everything evolution is liberal, so we're seeing an explosion of ideas of evolution applied to ideas themselves, from studies of internet communications to studies of scientific fads; even to the sociology of sociology!

So thank you, Kansas.


Pornography and relationships......

Hi, all. I am a 27 year old female who has been married and divorced once, and then, I married again. I have never really taken on any 'titles' to my points of view. I have strong feelings about things, but I have never classified them into a group of other's beliefs. I have never found one system of beliefs that fit everything I think and feel, so I don't bother trying to find one. I don't believe in God or any spiritual entity, but I do have my own ideas about morality.

I am curious how different people in this community might feel about pornography. I am curious if one feels it is okay at a certain point in life when one is not married or in a relationship. I am curious about one's feelings of its use inside a marriage with or without a spouse who consents to it. I am curious how one thinks their spouse should react to it. I am curious if one thinks it affects how he/she looks at him/herself. I am curious if one thinks it affects how he/she looks at others. I am curious how one thinks it changes their expectations in real sexual relationships. I am curious if one thinks it creates intimacy issues inside a relationship.

There are many other curiosities I can come up with, and if you are curious about my own viewpoint, you can read my own personal journal entry on it, which was the last entry I made in my own journal.

I am curious about this, obviously that I am posting it in this community, in a male viewpoint, as pornography is mainly geared towards men, and I believe them to be the main consumers of pornographic material.